It’s been one of those weeks. You know, the ones where there’s not time to take a breath before you’re on to the next thing, and then the next, and then the next. In fact it’s been one of those months. Life has been crazy for me with trying to get months of school done in much less time than normal. I had a goal—finish school completely this year.
And I’ve been determined, really determined. Ask my family :)
But Somebody else has a goal too. And He is determined. But I’ve been so engrossed in my goal that I’ve not been paying full attention to Him.
I’ve been realizing that my connection with Him was not as strong as it should be. And I’ve been asking Him to break through to me. He has. He always does. He’s done it in many ways: quotes, thoughts from friends, experiences, and His still small voice.
Because is anything really in it’s right place if it comes before Him?
And are my deadlines really a good excuse for not memorizing or spending quality time with Him at noon?
Are my goals more important than His goals?
It seems so clear when I think of it this way. Nothing is more important than Him. Our priority is ultimately Him, isn’t it? The other day I heard a saying that really hit me. When we come to the end of our lives “first priorities become only priorities.” And aren’t we told to live everyday like our last?
We were talking with some friends the other day, and one of them shared a thought with us that has really stuck in my mind this week. We often use God as a tool to achieve our goals, but isn’t He supposed to use us as tools to achieve His goals? We ask Him to help us do this and that, but shouldn’t we be asking Him how we can best be used by Him?
After a strenuous morning yesterday of trying to get two weeks of biology done in a day, I sat down at my desk with a prayer forming in my heart.
Lord, it doesn’t matter about my goal. I give it up. I will finish school whenever You want me to. I’m not going to use You as my tool any longer. Use me. Fulfill Your goals in me. Make me Your tool. And if that means I finish school next year, that's okay.
And you know there’s joy in sacrifice when it’s for Jesus. I think the joy of giving far outweighs the joy of achieving.
Jesus, teach us to never use You as a tool for accomplishing our goals—even if they're good. Teach us-- teach me-- to be Your tool; and let us accomplish Your goals—they are infinitely better than our own.
20. Lover of Jesus. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Servant. Fan of the kitchen. Graduate of Masters of Biblical Counseling.
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Hands Open. Heart Full.